Am I going to lose everything?

Tuesday was National Coming Out Day. Wyoming Equality held a dessert reception at a local church and invited people to come and share their coming out stories. I was moved and humbled at the life experiences told by these remarkable folks.

The evening was very relaxed and informal. We all sat around a big table while enjoying decadent desserts, sipping on rainbow punch, stepping out of our comfort zones, and talking about the day our lives changed forever.

I want you to imagine how scary it would be to tell the people that you love your gay, especially when you grew up listening to anti gay rants from family members every time something gay was on TV or the local gay couple was seen around town.

What are my mom and dad going to think? What will my brothers and sisters say? Will I lose my job? What about my friends? Are my children still going to want a relationship with me and how will this affect them? What are my ultra religious grandparents going to think?

These are questions that I agonized over for months and months before I came out. I had nightmares about every scenario and was preparing to lose everything. I'm a very strong willed independent person, however I have a huge loving family, and I made myself physically sick thinking about them never speaking to me again.

Luckily, for me, none of that happened. For the most part my family was extremely supportive and excited for me to start living my life and being true to myself. Many at the reception were not that fortunate.

I heard stories of parents not speaking to their kids for months on end, brothers who'd go out of their way to avoid running into a gay sibling, living a total closeted life because if you were outed you would lose your job immediately; and so many more stories were shared over the course of the evening that were both heartbreaking and inspirational.

The good news..... Many of these relationships have healed. Attitudes have changed and softened. Family members have realized that they want and need relationships with their loved ones, regardless of their sexual orientation. Employers have taken steps to ensure LGTB people are protected at work. Schools are implementing anti bullying campaigns. As the saying goes, "It is getting better!!!"

Overall, the evening was dominated with laughter and smiles. One couple in attendance is actually getting married this weekend in Iowa. I'm so happy for them!! I was also thrilled to have a handful of straight allies in attendance throwing their support behind this event.

I hope this will inspire you to reach out to your LGTB friends, family, co-workers, colleagues, and let them know that you love and support them.

Jeran